i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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