I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Randomize
