I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Randomize