Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
