I could make wine with my vomit
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize
