He is an equal opportunity slut.
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
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