NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
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