She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
Randomize
