He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Come share oat with me in your robe
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Randomize
