Whod you bang
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
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