I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize