That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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