He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
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