That's intense
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
operation harelip BJ is a go
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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