Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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