Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
the liver wants what the liver wants
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
