Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Randomize