we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize
