We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
We had to coat check the pizza.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
