it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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