one two three fourrrrnication!
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
