Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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