Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I have so many feelings about this burrito
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
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