Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
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