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Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize
