dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize