is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
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