I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
