Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
