How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
