I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
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