oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
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