Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
Randomize
