break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
Randomize
