Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
i need some magic done to my vagina
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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