Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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