Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Randomize
