you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Randomize
