You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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