It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I licked your asshole in confidence.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
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