TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Randomize
