operation have a gay friend backfired
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
