Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Randomize
