dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
