the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
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