Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Randomize
