Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I didn't notice because vodka
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Randomize
