Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize