We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Randomize
