Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize
