are you so shy because you have an std?
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Randomize
