he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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